A Sense of Belonging in Nature

I feel a deep sense of belonging in nature. Last night I was on the beach for the first time in two weeks. I spent the past two weeks in the rolling hills landscape of the Mid-Atlantic region of the U.S., and most of my time was spent with other people. This was out of the ordinary, as typically the balance for me falls in the opposite direction, spending most of my time in solitude writing, being in nature, meditating, or making photographs and spending a lesser percentage of my time with people.

Though there was lingering cold air and wind from the recent snowstorm that hit the south, I felt drawn to be back at the beach. I was longing for the sights, smells, and sounds of the ocean and seascape, needing the comfort of a sense of belonging in nature. I stood bundled in two coats, a hat, scarf and gloves, bracing against the bitter cold wind as a ring-billed gull stood at the edge of the surf, the wind ruffling the feathers on its back. As the sunset progressed, the sky turned shades of pastel pink and lavender. Something about these colors in the sky soothes me. 

Last night I was on the beach for the first time in two weeks. I spent the past two weeks in the rolling hills landscape of the Mid-Atlantic region of the U.S., and most of my time was spent with other people. This was out of the ordinary, as typically the balance for me falls in the opposite direction, spending most of my time in solitude writing, being in nature, meditating, or making photographs and spending a lesser percentage of my time with people.

Though there was lingering cold air and wind from the recent snowstorm that hit the south, I felt drawn to be back at the beach. I was craving the sights, smells, and sounds of the ocean and seascape, craving the comfort of my spiritual connection with nature. I stood bundled in two coats, a hat, scarf and gloves, bracing against the bitter cold wind as a ring-billed gull stood at the edge of the surf, the wind ruffling the feathers on its back. As the sunset progressed, the sky turned shades of pastel pink and lavender. Something about these colors in the sky soothes me. 

Last night I watched the rhythm of the low tide, the waves rolling in, but only so far, as some greater force pulled them back out. In that moment, I found comfort in knowing that there is an ongoing interaction between earth, sun, and moon that creates these daily tide-generating forces. The constancy of these forces, like the rising and setting of the sun, provides something steady in each day that I like to lean into.

In moments of fear or anxiety, these constants in nature remind me that on some level, all is well, and that I feel a sense of belonging with something much larger than myself. As I’ve been sorting through belongings during the past month, attempting to more deeply understand both the comfort and burden of belongings, I’ve also been considering the notion of belonging, as in a sense of belonging with nature and with other people. Though the notion of belongings and belonging seem on the surface to be unrelated, I am finding that they are deeply connected. I’ll be writing more about that in future blogs.

I have spent the better part of the past year deepening my spiritual connection with nature. As a child growing up on a lake, my connection with nature and feelings of belonging there was my salvation. Reinforcing that sense of belonging in nature has been one of the primary focuses of my meditation practice this year. At times I become caught in what one of my meditation teachers, Tara Brach, calls the trance of fear. When I become so consumed by the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs of fear that I forget that who I am is something larger, remembering my connection with God through nature calls me back home to myself. It reminds me that no matter what happens in each passing moment, I am OK.

As I stood on the beach last night, where I have stood for many nights during the past several months, I realized that for the first time in a really long time, I would rather be with other people than be alone on the beach in that moment. Though the sound of the waves, the sights of the pastel pinks and purples in the sky, and the sight of the gull met my longing for connection with spirit, in that moment, none of it met my longing for a more constant and stable connection and sense of belonging with people. This year, I am further exploring how to maintain the balance of being present with myself and maintaining a sense of belonging with nature and God while at the same time moving toward a greater sense of belonging with other people.

Today as I downloaded and edited images from last night’s walk on the beach, I found myself feeling drawn to convert some of the images to black and white. Though I worked in black and white many years ago, I have worked primarily in color for the past 20 years. As I look back at each image in color and then in black and white, each evokes something different in me. The pastel colors still soothe me, and the black and white images cut past something and get to the heart of what I felt when I was on the beach last night. 

Which of these images do you prefer, the color or black and white? Are you able to articulate why?