Staying steady during difficult times is an intention that mindfulness and meditation can support. Life is filled with 10,000 joys and 10,000 sorrows. When difficult moments arise, how can we stay balanced and steady to ride the waves of sorrow or uncertainty?
The tendency is to react to difficulty with swirling thoughts, imagining possible scenarios, attaching a story to the unfolding circumstances. The mind grasps at these thoughts in an attempt to feel some sort of control over what feels out of our control.
The way to stay steady is to let go of the swirling thoughts, breathe, rest the awareness on the arising of whatever emotion comes—sadness, grief, fear, feelings of aloneness—and be present with how this feeling expresses itself in the body. Bring awareness to sensations that arise in the chest, throat, stomach, head or other areas of the body, and allow this feeling to arise, crest, and pass away like a blue wave in the ocean.
When we meditate on the arising and passing away of things, we come to accept that everything is impermanent. In this awareness, we find freedom from grasping and clinging to what was and open our heart to be present to whatever arises. And while turning toward these difficult moments and waves of emotion, it’s equally important to cultivate moments of joy, gratitude, generosity and lovingkindness, as these states will serve to keep us balanced amidst the sorrow and uncertainty.
Meditation and mindfulness can help us to build resilience for coping in the present moment and when difficult times arise in the future.
The opposite of samsara is when all the walls fall down, when the cocoon completely disappears and we are totally open to whatever may happen, with no withdrawing, no centralizing into ourselves. That is what we aspire to, the warrior’s journey.
–Pema Chodron