Focus on good with mindfulness. The brain has a negativity bias, so the mind tends to focus on what’s not right with us and the world around us. We can counteract this bias by choosing to focus on the good. When we practice mindfulness we train our attention. We learn how to be aware of where our attention lies, and we learn how to let things go and refocus our attention on thoughts that nurture a more wholesome mental and emotional state that supports wellbeing.
Goodness is the only investment that never fails.
Henry David Thoreau
We spend a great deal of time evaluating ourselves and our lives, and quite often we may feel that we do not measure up—to our standards or to what we perceive as others’ standards. We may compare our insides to others’ outsides and feel like we fall short. Seeing our own shortcomings can be a positive thing as long as we use our inner wisdom to discern what we can change and take action toward that end vs what we cannot change and focus on acceptance.
When we fall into the habit of noticing what is not right with us and then ruminating about those things or criticizing ourselves, this creates unwholesome mental and emotional states that do not support our wellbeing. At any moment, we can begin a new habit of noticing this tendency, and when we notice this tendency, we can choose to change it.
What are the things that you ruminate about that you don’t like about yourself? Consider making a list of these things, and then wisely discern whether these are things that you can change or not. If you cannot change them, can you begin to practice accepting them as you also shift your attention toward appreciating your strengths? And if you discern that you can change the things that you don’t like about yourself, can you create an action plan for growing in these areas?
Either way, we could all likely benefit from focusing more attention on what’s right with us and the world. We can focus our attention on our loving heart, our good intentions, the basic goodness of humankind, the way that all beings are alike in that we all long to be happy and at peace, the ways that we make meaningful contributions in the world, times that we have reached out to help someone who was suffering, times that others have reached out to try to ease our suffering, or any other aspect of our own goodness or the goodness of others. Just for today, try to focus on good in yourself, others, and the world. Wake up tomorrow, and try to do the same thing again.